015 | Goldenrod City | Text / Action;

[nostabbing]

[Handwritten | Parker's Notes| Not Posted To Network]
THINGS I WOULD LIKE FOR MY BIRTHDAY

1. Money
2. Unmarked bills with non-sequential serial numbers
3. Loose diamonds
4. Money
5. Gold bars
6. Gold bars are kind of hard to move, though
7. They're heavy and not easily liquidated, also clunky
8. Money

THINGS ALICE WOULD LIKE FOR HER BIRTHDAY

1. Vege
1. World peace
1. ...Bunnies?????

THINGS NORMAL PEOPLE LIKE FOR THEIR BIRTHDAYS

1. Money
1. No bad guys ruining their lives
2. TV...s
3. Stuff they like
4. ?????

THINGS HARDISON WOULD LIKE FOR HIS BIRTHDAY

1. Video games
2. Robots
3. Stolen cell phones
4. Can you steal the internet?
4. The bank of Iceland
5. Pretzels
6. Doing stuff with me ?

THINGS ELIOT WOULD LIKE FOR HIS BIRTHDAY

1. Cooking
2. People to punch
3. Bad guys to punch
4. Sterling to punch
5. I would like Sterling to punch too

THINGS NATE WOULD LIKE FOR HIS BIRTHDAY

1. Alcohol
1. Alcohol
2. Forgiveness

THINGS SOPHIE WOULD LIKE FOR HER BIRTHDAY

1. Artwork
2. Diamonds
3. Fancy jewelry
4. Clothes
5. Shoes
6. Shoes should have been #1
7. SO MANY SHOES
8. For Nate to stop being so stupid
9. I bet princesses have a lot of cool stuff though

THINGS ISHIMARU WOULD LIKE FOR HIS BIRTHDAY

1. Justice
2. More of those cool bleach pen thingies
3. Red

~

What do you think makes something a good present? Like a birthday present. You're supposed to give somebody a thing they'd really like, right? And if you don't know what they'd like, you ask them about it and maybe they tell you.

What if they tell you the stuff they like and you don't like it? Because you think it's not a good present or whatever. Does that make it a bad present?

If you're the person being asked what you want for your birthday, are you supposed to not ask for stuff that would make people feel bad about giving it to you?

...Also, why do people give each other presents on Christmas instead of giving them to Jesus? It's not everyone else's birthday on Christmas.

I mean I guess maybe it's some people's but it's not everybody's who gets presents on Christmas.

...And why isn't "Happy Birthday" a Christmas carol, then?

Comments

[text | private]

[nostabbing]

I don't...want to go buy anything with it, though. I just want to have it.

That's super weird, right?

[text | private]

[crystalballer]

Like, to save it? That's not weird. Plenty of people do that.

[text | private]

[nostabbing]

Yeah. And to count it. And smell it.

[text | private]

[crystalballer]

[Okay maybe that last one is weird, but he said he wouldn't judge...!]

Counting money's fun, especially when you have a lot. I like counting the cash I get from fortune telling.

Does money smell good to you?

text;

[superordinary]

Dormant. Extinct volcanoes haven't erupted in thousands of years.

[text | private]

[nostabbing]

Mmhmm!

[It doesn't show in text, obviously, but she's nodding enthusiastically at her Gear nevertheless.]

It's the best, and you can tell a whole ton about a bill just from the way it smells, like what year it was printed and the kind of places it's been used and whether or not the fibers have started to break down...

text;

[nostabbing]

So it might still go off while you're there.

text;

[superordinary]

Yeah, but I doubt it will.

text;

[ossifragant]

People like that can be difficult.

Get them something small. Maybe make it yourself.

text;

[angerpoints]

Fine, whatever!

[>B(]

So why're you asking all these questions, anyway? You taking some kind of weird survey, or have you never given anyone a birthday present before?

text;

[nostabbing]

[... :|a ]

No. It's just my birthday on Sunday.

text;

[nostabbing]

Oh. That's a good idea, I can just tell them to do that.

text;

[nostabbing]

But it might.

text;

[superordinary]

The odds of it happening while we're there are astronomically small.

text;

[angerpoints]

Oh.

[... ... :|a]

And you're worried about asking for a present that your friends won't like, or something?

text;

[ossifragant]

Handmade gifts are better, anyway. Even if the person is hard to buy gifts for, they'll be able to appreciate something that was made for them instead of just bought.

[Hopefully, anyway.]

[text | private]

[crystalballer]

Whoa. So you know a lot about money.

[He feels like she and Togami could have long conversations about it. But he wonders what the use of all that information could be...]

How long have you been really into money stuff?

text;

[nostabbing]

Kinda.

I don't want my friends to have to do something for me if it's gonna make them feel bad.

[text | private]

[nostabbing]

[You know...that's actually a really good question, Hagakure. One she's probably never been asked before.

Which is why her response takes a little while.]

I guess I started liking it after I left my third or fourth foster home. I got moved around a lot. I remember it was before I was living in an empty storage unit in New York, though, because I know I knew a lot about it by then. So I guess I must've been maybe ten or eleven?

text

[lieutenantantichrist]

Anything that's more like the amount a Nigerian prince would ask you for.

Who are you shopping for, anyway?

text;

[angerpoints]

You're gonna ask them for a dead skunk, aren't you.

text;

[nostabbing]

That was an example.

text

[nostabbing]

I'm not. It's my birthday on Sunday.

I was trying to figure out what to ask for.

text;

[angerpoints]

All right, so then what were you gonna ask them for? 'Cause if it ain't gross or really expensive, I don't see what there is to be so worried about.

TEXT

[codpieces]

:oOOO
WhOaAa DaMn
Is CoAl A bAd ThInG?
lIkE . . .
wHaT iF iT's A pReSeNt ToO?